Well, here we are… my last weekend of freedom before the big surgery.
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t scared. Not so much of the surgery itself — I’ll be unconscious for that, and I have great confidence in my surgeons and the whole medical team. It’s what I might wake up to find… what recovery might involve… that has me scared. It’s the total helplessness of not being able to work, not being able to drive, spending day after day at home knowing my biggest challenge will be going up and down stairs (and being so sick I’m actually scared to attempt it.) I would do just about anything not to have to go through this, to be able to fast-forward to November when — God willing and all goes well — things should be pretty much back to normal.
But it looks like the fast-forward is not to be. This time around healing will not come miraculously but the old-fashioned way: I’m going to have to work for it.
But I have confidence too. I’ve been blessed with a body that works well and bounces back quickly. I already know what it’s like to have surgery done through my nose (did that earlier this year) and I know I can handle that kind of discomfort. I know I have the best doctors in the city, probably some of the best in the country, for this particular kind of surgery. All the medical personnel and staff I’ve met at UPMC-Presbyterian have been top-notch. And above all, people around the city and in various parts of the nation and the world are lifting me in prayer. I can feel the power of those prayers. Even during the tough times when I can’t figure out what to say to God, I can at least say to Him “please listen to the folks who are talking to You about me”. And I’m confident that God has something in mind for all this, a purpose I don’t yet see clearly.
Keep those prayers going! And I’ll see you all on the other side.
For those who are interested, here’s what UPMC-Presby has to say about my condition and “part 1” of the two-part surgery I’ll be having: CSF Leaks
And for those who would like to visit, visitor’s hours and information: Visitors